Another Child?
I promise, I have happier posts lined up soon! We went on a great mini road-trip, and I have several pictures for sharing. Will be posting them over the next few days!
Just wanted to share some sad news that I've known for a couple of weeks. Often, since Kat died, we get told, "don't worry, you're still young, you'll have another chance!" FYI, this does not hurt our feelings, it's not like people are intentionally telling us that another baby will replace Kat --- we know what they mean that, at least, we still have another chance. Though we are young (question mark here, we might actually be old!), and we would love nothing more than to have another baby to hold (I think this comes with the territory of giving birth but not coming home with your baby), I fear it won't be possible.
This is not to say that we might not get pregnant again. Knowing us, we could and probably would =p. *Insert humor here, hahaha.* But reading up about CDH, even though statistics online say the chances of having another child with CDH are low, I can't help thinking that it's REALLY, REALLY HIGH. In our online group alone, so many parents have 2nd and 3rd children who have CDH. Don't ask me how many of them survived, or which one did --- I don't think I want to know anymore. We don't know the cause, most likely it's genetic since it happens over and over again. So we could get pregnant again.
Would our baby survive? That's the question. Sadly, one of the active members in the online group I subscribe to, Neil, is expecting their 2nd child --- and his baby has CDH. Read his heartbreaking post about it HERE. Such a strong family, they are always in my thoughts, though we don't know each other at all. I know, though, in my heart, that their baby will make it thru, and they will have 2 miracles, not just 1.
Oh man, this whole thing.. it's really traumatizing. Nobody ever wants to see another baby go thru what our babies have to go thru. I always look back and think, thank you God, we made it thru (even though we're still going thru it.) But a 2nd time? I really don't know how I could collect the broken parts after.
So another child, ever again? Would we actively pursue it? Right now, probably not (but if it happens, it happens.) I think the answer here is neither YES or NO. It would be... hopefully. Hopefully, we would be blessed with a normal child to add to our 2 beautiful ones. Sure, the 22 weeks getting to the anomaly scan would be pure hell. But it would be worth it, to see him/her completely safe and normal. Hopefully... I think that's the right key word.
Just wanted to share some sad news that I've known for a couple of weeks. Often, since Kat died, we get told, "don't worry, you're still young, you'll have another chance!" FYI, this does not hurt our feelings, it's not like people are intentionally telling us that another baby will replace Kat --- we know what they mean that, at least, we still have another chance. Though we are young (question mark here, we might actually be old!), and we would love nothing more than to have another baby to hold (I think this comes with the territory of giving birth but not coming home with your baby), I fear it won't be possible.
This is not to say that we might not get pregnant again. Knowing us, we could and probably would =p. *Insert humor here, hahaha.* But reading up about CDH, even though statistics online say the chances of having another child with CDH are low, I can't help thinking that it's REALLY, REALLY HIGH. In our online group alone, so many parents have 2nd and 3rd children who have CDH. Don't ask me how many of them survived, or which one did --- I don't think I want to know anymore. We don't know the cause, most likely it's genetic since it happens over and over again. So we could get pregnant again.
Would our baby survive? That's the question. Sadly, one of the active members in the online group I subscribe to, Neil, is expecting their 2nd child --- and his baby has CDH. Read his heartbreaking post about it HERE. Such a strong family, they are always in my thoughts, though we don't know each other at all. I know, though, in my heart, that their baby will make it thru, and they will have 2 miracles, not just 1.
Oh man, this whole thing.. it's really traumatizing. Nobody ever wants to see another baby go thru what our babies have to go thru. I always look back and think, thank you God, we made it thru (even though we're still going thru it.) But a 2nd time? I really don't know how I could collect the broken parts after.
So another child, ever again? Would we actively pursue it? Right now, probably not (but if it happens, it happens.) I think the answer here is neither YES or NO. It would be... hopefully. Hopefully, we would be blessed with a normal child to add to our 2 beautiful ones. Sure, the 22 weeks getting to the anomaly scan would be pure hell. But it would be worth it, to see him/her completely safe and normal. Hopefully... I think that's the right key word.
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